RP:// Zacky Haner. Mr Haner 4 Zacky Baker. I love Mr Haner..

Zacky wrote:

Brian wrote:

[[And my latest guitar efforts: Yay!]]

((Yay! Well done!!! -hugs- Jo is upset now, cos she can't play like that. Haha. And she is attacking my cat.))

[[Jo, don't take it out on the cat. Hang on, has she ever even picked up a guitar? You have to practice to be able to plaaaaay. LoL.]]

((That is very true. She cooked the cat! She is complaing that there is cat hairs in the soup. She cooked the cat!!))

Yeah. But uncles are supposed to be cool and buy their nephews or nieces everything in sight.
-laughs-
So, you planning to be the hard ass parent? Or is that gonna be Matt's domain?
Speaking of which, how do you think he's gonna react about your...
-motions to chest-
Y'know. Breasts?

Nightmares and flashbacks to when he used to sleep with women possibly.
*laughs*
Well, he probably won't be happy with it... just another reasons for me not to sleep with him.
*sighs*
It's stupid and all but since getting pregnant, I've kinda gone off the whole sex thing. I mean, don't get me wrong I still find Matt very attractive - who wouldn't? But... I dunno, I just don't feel comfortable being intimate with him when I feel so... ugly. I know you said I was glowing and shit but compared to how I used to be and compared to him, I just feel like an ugly, fat, bloated blob. I'm so self-conscious, I don't see how he'd want to be that close to me when I'm like this.
*shakes head*
Ah well, it's nothing... I'll be horny again in no time, I'm sure.
*smiles*
There's no way I could be the bad guy, I mean you've seen me give detentions, I get bored being pissed off and let everyone out. No I'll definitely be the good guy, getting us into debt buying stupid little bows for her hair or tiny guitars and shit like that.
*smiles*

-Blinks-
Ohh shit...I feel bad now...
-Smiles sadly at-
Aww Brian, I had no idea you felt like this...
-Hugs-
-Holds on to hand and helps onto sofa and sits next to-
-Pushes own hair out of eyes-
I still think you look beautiful, if that helps.
-Smiles-
Does Matt not know all this? Is it why he turned to me?
You should talk to Matt about this, seriously. I'm guessing you haven't yet...
I mean, who knows what he might be thinking? You not wanting anything from him, he might think you're getting it somewhere else...
-Laughs-
You know what he's like. He always assumes it is something else than it is.
-Smiles sweetly at-
I definitely think you need to talk to him about it.
I don't think he'll ever think of you as a fat blob though, yeah, he might make jokes sometimes, but I'm sure he sees you as the Brian Haner that he fell in love with.

I know I need to talk to him about it but it's kinda hard to broach the subject.
"Oh honey, sorry I've not been sleeping with you, I feel ugly. Your needs don't matter."
*sighs*
Maybe I should get my hair done or my nails, something to make me feel pretty.
*laughs*
I've got tits, why not go the whole way?
It's all just a blow, you know?
Going from being voted Gay Times Sexiest Readers Partner to this, I'm not used to feeling so paranoid about the way I look.

-Hugs again-
Honey, You are still attractive!
And Matt'll understand if you feel paranoid. If anything, he could make you feel better, y'know.
-winks-
Aww sweetie.
-strokes hand through Brian's hair-
Just because you gain a few pounds doesn't make you unattracive. I mean, you're not a whale.
-laughs softly-
And you've got your hair, your great skin, your tattoos and your beautiful face.
And since when was Matt only into looks, Uh? He loves you for you.
-smiles-

[[I think my sister wants to kill me, she looks like a 50's housewife so I keep calling her Brenda.]]

*smiles*
Yeah, you're right.
And it's not like I'm fat because I've been eating too much or some such shit, I've got a baby in here.
*runs hand over stomach*
Proof of just how much Matt loves me.
I shouldn't let this bother me.
Thanks Zee.

It's no problem.
-rubs back-
So, you do want to be intimate with Matt? You just...don't.
I'm confusing myself here, don't listen to me.
-laughs-
Besides, I read somewhere that apparently sex is good for the baby.
-shrugs-
So, what are you planning on doing when he returns from ye ole supermarket?
-smiles at-

I do, I just feel... felt self-conscious about it.
Kinda feeling better now though.
*clasps hands together*
Please don't tell Matt that sex is good for the kid... he'll never let me leave our bed. Not that that's necessarily a bad thing, it's just nice to be able to walk sometimes and... heh, well you don't think I have that swish in my step naturally, do you?
*laughs*
I think I might just have to have my wicked way with him.
*smirks*
I apologize in advance for the noises.

-smiles at-
Really? Aww, thats good then and seriously, no problem. It will be nice to see the two of you sporting them goofy smiles again.
-laughs-
Besides, I can just try and phone Mick again. Try some phone sex, I have always wanted to do that, hopefully he will pick up the phone this time.
-sighs-
Well, if you want that book to have a look through, I got it for you two if you want me to go and get it from my room.

It'll be nice to have something to smile about that isn't a day without puking.
Yeah, could probably do with looking at something remotely related to this whole thing.
*laughs*
I've done the whole phone sex thing. In fact... heh... while I was in college doing my training I kinda did the whole sex-line chat worker thing. It was my way of making extra money. It was interesting, can't count the amount of personalities I had to create for it.
*shakes head*
You probably didn't need to know that, haha.

-laughs-
Oh man, I bet you got some real sicko's calling you.
-smiles at-
And, you got any tips for the phone sex? Since I hav never done it before.
-stands up-
I will get that book for you now. It is really intereting.
-runs from living room-
((Inserts getting book here))
-comes back into living room-
-hands Brian book on "Sex and Pregnancy for the gay man."-
-smiles at and sits down again-

Thanks.
*flips idly through book*
Yeah, I had loads of dirty bastards. One guy wanted me to treat him like a baby, telling him that... *puts on sexy voice* Daddy's very mad at baby. Daddy thinks baby needs a spanking.
*shudders*
That was beyond wrong.
You've just got to be able to picture what you're doing, don't try too hard to be sexy, just be yourself, be the way you would be around Mick if he was here.

Eww, thats kinda wrong.
-puts pillow on Brian's stomach-
Don't listen baby.
-laughs-
Thanks. I need to try that. Since, I'm finally getting used to Mick not being around. I just need to call him more on the phone. And, I kinda need to hear his voice, I don't know. Just to remind me he's still here, with me, even though he's in Florida. I confuse myself...
-peers over Brian's shoulder-
So, what do you think of the book?

I know what you mean, it's nice to know you're still with a person and not just with a... JESUS FUCKING CHRIST, WHAT THE HELL IS THAT?!
*slams book shut*
Oh God, what am I doing?!
*opens page again*
Fuck, I've seen Hostel 17 times, Saw III made me hungry but that is going to give me nightmares.
*points to picture of natural male childbirth*
I am having a C-Section.

-looks at picture-
Ouch.
-holds onto crotch-
I thought you were planning to have a C-Section anyway.
-takes book-
Anyways, chapter 4 is the chapter I was trying to show you.
-opens page and shows to Brian-
-points to title-
Sexual positions and sex play during pregnancy.
-hands book back to-
Let's save the later chapters for when you're feeling a little braver. Or when I'm feeling a little braver.
-laughs-

*shudders*
Well at some point everyone gets the thought that maybe a natural birth would be nice... no. No way in gay hell.
Oooh legitimate porn...
*skims through page*
'Typically the pregnant man will be bottoming, although it is possible with some creative positioning for him to top.'

I see that I have cheered you up.
-laughs-
Does this make you feel a little sexier now? Or do I have to dip you in chocolate sauce?

-laughs-

Yeah, I feel a bit better.
I mean look at these guys, they're almost as hot as me.
*smirks*
Maybe I can be sexy and pregnant.
*gestures to moobs*
Even with these.
*laughs*
You can dip me in chocolate sauce if you like, it'd be something different, heh.

I feel a lot better now. I can see he's happy. And hopefully this will make Matt happy. And that means I can be happy and we can hopefully get rid of some of this tension.
-smiles at-
Yeah, almost. And, what's sexier than a guy that can pull off the pregnant look, huh? Nothing, thats what.
-smiles at-
-squeezes Brian's moob-
Mmmm sqiushy. Like pillows.
-laughs-
I think I'll save the chocolate for another day. Or let Matt get his hands on you first.
-laughs-
Lord knows, he'll be like an animal.

*watches moob fondling*
Dude, I feel violated.
*laughs*
Y'know, they're almost as big as Matt's now.
We've not slept together since I first found out about this, that was like a month, month and a half ago? He'll come before he can even touch me.
*laughs*
Oh God, I hope not...

Come on, I've never coped a feel of a boob before. Give me a break.
-laughs-
Seriously, so I shouldn't be expecting hours of banging headboards and screams of pleasure to keep me awake all night?
-smirks-
Good.
Hopefully I'll last longer with Mick. Although I haven't touched myself since he left.
-bites lip-
I'm gonna suck at this phone sex. At least I won't run up your phone bill.
-laughs-

[[I'm crying with laughter at the moment over images of Zacky fondling Syn's moob and Syn screaming "MOOB RAPE!!!"]]

*sighs wistfully*
Alas no.
Which kinda sucks. I was looking forward to that now.
*huffs*
You're the gayest gay man ever, you can't grope a woman's boob, you have to grope mine.
Even I've fondled girl boobs before.
*shudders*
I'm sure you'll last long enough for the phone company to cut us off again, could be kinda disappointing for the people who have our phone tapped otherwise.

-Bursts through front door in flamboyant camp manner-
Hey guys! I'm back!
-Throws out arms and waves around excitedly-
-Has millions of bags-
Oh my god, you'll never guess what I found...
-Rummages into a bag-
-Pulls out small black top-
How cute is that?! Seriously.
I was on my way to the supermarket and I saw this baby shop, and I just couldn't resist.
There was such cute things, and they also had fashion for the Mpreg baby. Like "My daddies are cooler than yours" which made me
How adorable is that? I bought so much I...
-Finally looks at Brian and Zacky-
-Grins-
Haha, Brian are you wearing a stuffed bra again? Seriously, if it wasn't funny when you did in high school for non school uniform day, it's just plain freaky now you're 27.
-Laughs-

((I'm also a-lol'ing. LOL.))

Brian. You are a hell of a lot prettier than any girl. Of course I'd rather grope your boob. Even though I did grope my friend once, she wanted to know what I thought as a gay guy of her boobs. I told her they scared me, she slapped me.
-laughs-
I hope so. I don't wanna disappoint him. He might decide to stay in Florida then. Heh.
-shrugs-
I don't mind the government listening in, I just don't want you and Matt listening in on the upstairs phone when you get bored, ok?